The writing uses chronological order, and good specific details. Sentence structure is good and invented spelling shows attention to phonics. In addition, the pictures match the text.

Perhaps with more explicit guidelines, students will pay more attention to the requirements.

This student is focused on ideas and needs to go back to review his work. If he did he might add periods and notice that help needs an -ed.

You might ask him to read the text to you and then write in the spelling of key words. This would show that you care about his ideas and it would also show him how to spell the words.