Added December 03, 2019 at 10:35am by Abigail Zamora (suggested by Paul Allison)
Title: I think your readers will appreciate shorter paragraphs.

The text below is the previous wording for paragraph 2 (click to return there).

12

Paragraph 12 changes

Hello Dee or I should call you Wangero, whatever. I am writing this letter because I would like to know how you are doing. It has been a long time without knowing about you, since . Since mom passed away, the last thing that I know about you is your address. Well, there is a lot to tell you. I am married and I have started a program to learn to be a well reading better reader and writingwriter. At the beginning I was scared of people like mom said, but people are not bad… well some people. I feel like if mom was the one that make who made me or saw me like the scariest person in the world, and I understand her. Sometimes the world could be rude and cruel for someone like me. However I do not feel resentment because my mom gave you great opportunities which I wish I could have had. It feels felt strange and sad that when mom tells told us that she loves equal to us both equally, but she always treat both treated us differently.I remember when you came back I was excited because maybe you can could help mom to understand that I can could attend school, that people would not treat me differently just because my scars or convince her that I have to be brave in the eyes of society.Sometimes I like to think that she loved me a lot and was trying to protect me, but is it healthier for me to think that she loves us according to what she thought was better.?However I would like to visit you one day and maybe have a cup of tea and talk about our lifelives. I almost forgot to tell you that I have always admired you.

Hello Dee or I should call you Wangero, whatever. I am writing this letter because I would like to know how you are doing. It has been a long time without knowing about you. Since mom passed away, the last thing that I know about you is your address. Well, there is a lot to tell you. I am married and I have started a program to learn to be a better reader and writer. At the beginning I was scared of people like mom said, but people are not bad… well some people. I feel like if mom was the one who made me or saw me like the scariest person in the world, and I understand her. Sometimes the world could be rude and cruel for someone like me. However I do not feel resentment because my mom gave you great opportunities which I wish I could have had. It felt strange and sad when mom told us that she loves us both equally, but she always treated us differently. I remember when you came back I was excited because maybe you could help mom to understand that I could attend school, that people would not treat me differently just because my scars or convince her that I have to be brave in the eyes of society. Sometimes I like to think that she loved me a lot and was trying to protect me, but is it healthier for me to think that she loves us according to what she thought was better? However I would like to visit you one day and maybe have a cup of tea and talk about our lives. I almost forgot to tell you that I have always admired you.

DMU Timestamp: November 27, 2019 01:26

Added December 03, 2019 at 3:03pm by Abigail Zamora
Title: Wording change

The text below is the previous wording for paragraph 4 (click to return there).

Well, there is a lot to tell you. I am married and I have started a program to learn a well reading and writing.

DMU Timestamp: November 27, 2019 01:26